The 2019 Goaties: #10 - Grindstone
This year’s Game of the Year endeavour is a little more involved. Instead of collapsing them into one interminable list, we’ll look at one game with a little more detail every day until the proper Game of 2019 has been decreed.
We’re starting off the countdown with a fever dream of colors, clanging steel, and frightened gremlins that nearly makes the case for Apple Arcade by itself.
The announcement of Apple Arcade, the iOS games subscription service, did very little for me at first blush. Even after putting aside the idea of games being dramatically devalued by adhering to this model of consumption, I was operating under the assumption that my groaning, creaking iPad Air would be far from capable. Their month-long free trial was as far as I was willing to commit, certain that any game pulled from these new digital shelves would be a stuttering, unplayable mess.
To my distinct surprise, the Air is pretty damned capable. While several games from the Arcade service are on my top 10 this year, none make as immediate and delightful an impression as Capy’s murder-puzzler, Grindstone.
“GRINDSTONE
(Apple Arcade)”
The setup is simple:
You are Jorj.
You must climb Grindstone Mountain.
You are very angry.
Across 150 levels - of which I’ve only seen about half! - you’ll cleave a bloodsoaked path of creatures big and small by merely tracing a line through them with your finger. It’s intuitive, effective, and satisfying to watch Capy’s tried and true house style breathe life into what could be an exhaustingly droll game. Each and every critter jumps from pleasant and passive to enraged, and ultimately to bug-eyed horror as your finger (and, shortly after, Jorj’s mighty blade - passes over them.
Any one level will run roughly five to fifteen minutes, with a straightforward initial goal. You might have to kill 50 critters, or 3 of the tougher Jerks that require a combo to take out. Along the way, you’ll pick up materials to spend on different sets of armor or equipment that offers valuable extra abilities. Two extra challenges show up shortly after the basic goal’s completion, and Grindstone’s beauty lies in both these challenges and the ways in which every level will eventually become absolutely brutal.
These jerks will manage to deal damage to each other, so long as Jorj isn’t in the way when he ends his turn…
With each turn taken, a handful of critters will get angry, their placid looks turning to flaming rage. End your turn next to one of these ferocious pipsqueaks, and they’ll chip away at one of your three hit points keeping Jorj from a stay at the Howling Wolf Inn at the mountain’s base. The longer you stay, the more you’ll have to weave around or endure these enraged hordes, with the entire grid of beasts potentially becoming one hellish flame. Plan your routes carefully, crack the chests and crush the Slobs, and feel the rush of victory as you topple down the exit door and move further up the path to glory.
Grindstone looks simple, but it’s deceptively deep, captivating and fulfilling. It’s a game that feels like it could go on forever in the hands of some procedural generation algorithm, but the fact that each level is (somewhat) authored gives the climb a sense of intent that feels uncommon in mobile games. I play a couple levels just about every night before bed, and it remains something I look forward to with marked consistency.
